This Software Looks At Your Face, Knows Your Name

My brother John just has that John look about him. He's just got that...you know, weird John look. Could you tell looking at him? I don't know, probably not. (And I wouldn't recommend it.) But you know what probably could? New software, created at Cornell University, can take a look at your face and take an educated guess on what your name is. That's right, it's profiling you. Because it's not enough to empower robots with cloud intelligence or crime prediction -- now we're letting them collect our faces. What can go wrong?

Survey Says: American TV Watchers Can’t Handle Only One Screen at a Time

You might think you're happy just watching TV, but if you're American, you might also suddenly feel the need to figure out where else you've seen that actor -- you know, What's-His-Face -- while you're watching. Best to look him up on IMDb with your smartphone, maybe even see if Netflix has it. Also, you might want to check if anyone commented on your Facebook status before the show's over. See, a new survey conducted by NPD says that TV-watching Americans are increasingly unsatisfied with just one screen at a time. 87% of viewers with a second-screen device will use it while watching the first one.

Being Lazy May Not Be Your Fault, Say Scientists Who Aren’t

Good news, couch potatoes! It may not be your fault that you don't want to get off your butt and be productive. In a display of not at all being lazy themselves, researchers at the University of Missouri have deduced that genetic traits might make some people prone to low motivation and inactivity.

Learn Java By Casting Spells, Saving Gnomes in a First-Person Video Game

What skills does your favorite video game give you? When you're done burning through the 12+ hours of BioShock Infinite, what'll you have to show for it? Probably a few enhanced motor skills and the aesthetic appreciation that comes with being immersed in a compelling story. That's certainly not nothing. For developing employable, useful skills, though, one game's got all the rest beat. Computer scientists at the University of California San Diego (UCSD) have created a video game that teaches students how to program in Java by casting spells and saving the world. A world of creepy, creepy little gnomes.

This Fish Has Clear Blood, No Scales, But Still Has a Big Heart

The deep ocean has all the coolest creatures. Fish with bioluminescence, giant isopods, gulper eels. If it's weird, glowing, or inhabits your nightmares, Earth's depths probably has it. But have you heard of the Ocellated Ice Fish, the deep-dwelling aquatic vertebrate in the Antarctic Ocean that has completely transparent blood? It's not scary, but it is exotic and its unusual physical traits don't end there, either.

Romanian Lawyer Sues Exorcists For Failing to Banish Fart Demons

People sue each other for all kinds of crazy things. Modern society has a reputation for it -- usually for things like spilled coffee, disturbing items found in fast food burgers, or for failure to stop someone from falling in love. But right now, Romania takes the cake for the stinkiest lawsuit ever. See, a lawyer in Pitesti, Romania, is suing an Orthodox bishop and four priests for failing to exorcise the "flatulent demons" from his home. You probably read that right, but let me rephrase for clarity. He's suing them for not getting rid of his fart devils.

Marvel #1 Tries Again: 700 Free Digital Downloads Available Until Midnight Tomorrow Night

We got mad psyched a few weeks ago when Marvel tried to offer free digital downloads of 700 titles from their current and past runs. Well, the giveaway didn't quite work. The servers were overwhelmed by the surge and everything slogged to a halt because, hey, free stuff. Now it's take two: Marvel's trying again to hook you with the offer of up to 700 first-issue downloads, but rather than making it a crazy free-for-all, fans need to sign up on ComiXology's special promotions page -- assuming they can keep that page working. Oh, and you've got less than two days to get in on this.

New NASA Planet Hunter TESS Searches Entire Sky, Puts Kepler To Shame

We've already spotted more than 800 exoplanets beyond our Solar System, and more than a hundred of these were identified by NASA's Kepler mission in the four years since its launch merely by observing one small swath of sky. But now NASA has its sights on even more worlds with the newly green-lit Transiting Exoplanet Survey Satellite (TESS), a spacecraft set to launch in 2017. Hit the jump to find out what makes this one so different.

Movie Studios Get Circular, Ask Google to Take Down Their Own DMCA Takedown Requests

Let's say you're a wealthy, seafaring merchant. You suspect a pirate is sneaking up the hull of your ship to steal your hard-earned doubloons in the hold, so you cry out to the Imperial Navy to arrest the dastardly villain! But when the Imperial pirate-hunter arrives, you panic and call to the Navy to come and arrest him, too -- yeah, the guy who was supposed to arrest the first guy. Well, that's sort of what some movie studios are doing right now. NBC Universal and Lionsgate, among others, are asking Google to take down the takedown requests they themselves had requested, and Google isn't having it.

Boston Dynamic’s PETMAN Gets a Head, Looks at You [Video]

It's that time again, folks. Time to watch everyone's favorite headless, suit-testing robot, PETMAN, strut his stuff into hypothetical peril. No, wait -- this time our creepy friend has a head and a gas mask! And not only does he walk, he squats, twists, and turns in the uncanny valley of lifelike creepiness, ensuring a place in your nightmares tonight. Designed by Boston Dynamics, PETMAN is used to "test the performance of protective clothing designed for hazardous environments."