1. Tech

    Never Suffer A Paper Jam Again With This Portable Printer That Works Like a Roomba

    Have you ever looked at a roomba and thought, "Gosh, it would be really cool if this automated vacuum cleaner were depositing ink all over my floor?" Probably not, but if it were tinier and you could use it to print out your homework just seconds before class starts, we bet you'd be into it.

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  2. Tech

    Robotic Glasses Promise To Give You Friendlier Eyeballs

    Someone once said that the eyes are the window to the soul. That guy must not have been familiar with "chronic bitchface," which is when your resting facial expression makes you look like you want to set things on fire. Thankfully, now there's a solution for those of us who have to constantly reassure our friends and coworkers that we're not upset.

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  3. Tech

    France Bans Work Emails During Non-Working Hours, What Will French Workers Compulsively Check Now?

    Working in France has some pretty great perks like several weeks of required vacation time and a 35-hour work week (though they've relaxed restrictions on exceeding that limit a bit in recent years). Well, they're going even further to protect their work/life balance by banning work-related email activity after working hours.

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  4. Tech

    Test Servers for Heartbleed Vulnerability With This Handy Browser Tool

    Heartbleed is freaking everybody on the Internet out right now, specifically because as we've learned, it's actually much more complicated than changing your passwords and hoping for the best. If you log in to a server while that server is still vulnerable, you might still be at risk, so you have to make sure that the site is no longer affected.

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  5. Tech

    Gary Busey Stars In This Amazon Fire TV Ad And It Actually Makes Sense

    Usually when I see Gary Busey on camera, I react similarly to how I might if my late grandpa had ever wandered into a commercial set -- so a lot of "Oh no, he must be so confused, let's get him back in his chair at home!" But this Amazon Fire TV spot leans into Busey's penchant for acting a bit nutty, and the end result is just delightful.

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  6. Tech

    A Malware Protection “Placebo” App Made $40,000 by Doing Nothing

    The placebo effect is great, because not only does it psychologically fix things from time to time, but it also tricks you into fun things like believing your car goes faster when you put a bunch of cool stickers on it. It also makes people a bunch of money when they sell an app that does nothing but tell people it's preventing malware.

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  7. Tech

    GoldieBlox Is Back with Another Adorable Commercial, Hopefully They Cleared the Song This Time

    GoldieBlox got into some trouble with The Beastie Boyz over one of their earlier commercials that parodied the song "Girls," but they won't let that keep them down. They're back with a new commercial showing off their engineering toys for girls, and they've brought some interesting statistics along with them.

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  8. Tech

    Minecraft Wasn’t Hacked, But You Should Probably Change Your Password If You Use the Internet

    No, I don't mean that in a hyperbolic, "hackers are going to steal your identity and become an evil pod-person version of you, freak the Hell out!" way. It's a good idea to change your password often, but it's an especially good idea if you use a site that employs an OpenSSL version that's vulnerable to the recently discovered Heartbleed bug.

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  9. Tech

    The UK’s Robot Soldier “Porton Man” Can Sense Chemical Warfare (and Probably Also Your Fear)

    If you thought the US was the only country building an army of robot nightmares, the UK's Porton Man robot soldier will assure you that no corner of the globe is safe from uncanny valley-fueled horror. Guys, I'm pretty sure they robots will make their own soldiers once they reach sentience. No need to help.

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  10. Tech

    You Can Now Search For Businesses in Yelp With Emoji

    So let's say that you need some coffee, but you don't know where to look for it, and you've also completely forgotten what it's called. I don't know, maybe you can't read or you've been in a traffic accident or something. Well don't worry, my confused friend! Now you don't have to know what it's called, just what it looks like.

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  11. Tech

    The US Government Secretly Created a “Cuban Twitter” to Stir up Political Dissent, Create “Smart Mobs”

    Somehow, the same government that can't set up a simple online signup form to save its life went full Zuckerberg and built an entire successful social media network... in Cuba. This must have been headed by the same people who made the turkey pardoning site for Thanksgiving, because that was easily the best functioning government website.

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  12. Tech

    Community College Tries to Have Twitter Account Pulled, Fails, Draws More Attention to Account It Tried to Have Pulled

    The president of Northampton Community College in Pennsylvania doesn't think the @NCC_Confess Twitter account is very funny, so he tried to have it pulled from the Internet. That went about as well as you would expect and resulted in a lot more attention for the account. Do they not have a class in How to Internet at NCC?

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  13. Tech

    It’s a bird! It’s a Video Game! No, It’s the Amazon Fire TV Set-Top Box, Watch out, Apple

    Amazon got into the set-top box game today with a competitor for Roku and and Apple TV in the form of Amazon Fire. They're at a disadvantage with being comparatively late in the game, but Amazon is aiming to build on the shortcomings of those other offerings with its new box, and they're shipping today.

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  14. Tech

    Festo’s Bionic Kangaroo Robot Can Probably Hop Forever… Into Your Nightmares

    It's very possible that Dr. Robotnik works for Festo after seeing this fascinating bionic kangaroo robot. That's right, friends! Festo has just unveiled a bionic kangaroo, and with the use of kangaroo physics (and just physics in general), this robot is able to move around and jump like any real one.

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  15. Tech

    SociBot Can Borrow Your Friends’ Faces, Presumably To Tell You They’ve Been “Saved”

    You know RoboThespian, the robot that performs stand-up for British audiences? If you've ever wanted to own your own version of him, then you're in luck -- you can get the SociBot instead. All you need is about $16,000 and an iron constitution that can withstand any foreboding sense of dread brought on by face-stealing robots.

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