Normally, I’d write something about this video and probably make some joke that isn’t very good unless you’re tired at the end of the day like the rest of us, but I just can’t beat a line from the description of the YouTube video, posted on an official NASA account. So, I’ll leave you with that: This is six minutes from Earth to forever.

Today in your weird sci-fi sex toy news, we have this dildo that represents the time vortex, complete with TARDIS flying along through it, dubbed the TARDIS Tickler. Obviously, sci-fi sex toys aren’t exactly a bare market, but I’m not entirely sure if any sex toy has ever tried to represent the whole of space and time until now. Obviously, there are some NSFW images below the break.

You’ve probably never heard of Ray Sipe, but nevertheless he is one of the most prolific YouTubers out there, with a massive 1,098 videos on his channel at the time of this writing, all uploaded over the span of a 9 months. Sipe’s a songwriter with a unique chanting style that really drives a point home — dozens of times — and through his work, he seems to be attempting to cover literally every possible subject, from “Turtle Gymnastics” to the death of Amy Winehouse. The tunes are quite seriously beyond belief, and I’ve collected a nice sampling to give you a taste. Consider it Zombie Caterpillars: The Best of Ray Sipe. Trust me, you need to see these.

This video called “Motion Feel” by artist Shinji Inamoto isn’t just a bunch of objects undergoing a series of bizarre transformations. Ok, maybe that is all there is, but it’s also a mind-bending visual and auditory treat, with a touch of horrific lurking around the edges. It’s weird, it’s wonderful, you should watch it.

It’s comforting to see that despite the demise of Burger King’s wonderfully bizarre ad campaigns, the fast food chain is still keepin’ it surreal overseas. If this Russian ad is any indication, with its unicorns, dachshund-wielding hooligans, and hamburger turntables, Burger King may well be on the cusp of something fantastic. Though the (Burger King) King is dead, his spirit clearly lives on. See the video, after the jump.

How Reddit tells it, someone — presumably poptent user trunstyle – was assigned to make an advertisement for a film class. This unofficial, in no way endorsed, ad for the Sour Patch Kids candies was the result. Like the candy, it attempts to be sour, then sweet. Unlike the candies, it starts really weird, gets okay, and then gets really, really weird.  See the video after the break, but the above image is only a taste (pun) of what is in store.

I’m sure you’re all as confused as I am.

Some pretty crazy stuff happens in manga, and you may already have your own stories and examples, but let me show you what I think might be the definitive limit: Super Saiyan Hitler, basically. I know, I know, it sounds completely ridiculous, but apparently it makes sense in context, which ultimately just makes things weirder.

This page is featured in the The Legend of Koizumi, where this kind of thing isn’t entirely uncommon. The premise of the whole thing is that former Japanese Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi fights various world-leaders from the present day and the past in order to save the world. How does he fight them? Mahjong. Naturally. So yeah, not only does this crazy blonde Hitler exist in the series (I don’t think he’s literally going Super Saiyan), but he’s about to sit down to a game of high-stakes Mahjong. Why? Who knows, not that you could possibly wrap your head around an answer anyways.

The Japanese commercials for Uncharted 3 will feature Harrison Ford playing the game, and as part of the process, he played bits of the game in order to produce some commentary, as well as to provide all of us with the above video that is fairly uncomfortably awkward. Anyone who knows Uncharted knows how awesome and meta it is that Harrison Ford is playing it, but for the uninitiated, it’s because Uncharted and its main character, the charming Nathan Drake, are heavily inspired by Indiana Jones. Head on past the break for an even more uncomfortable thirty second commercial of Harrison Ford breathing heavily while playing the game.

Anthropologists take note: This music video from the freshly minted boyband Heart2Heart will likely be cited as the watershed moment when our society embraced the concept of making romantic relationships public by declaring them “Facebook official.” Either that or this is a pitch-perfect (autotuned?) parody from former ‘N Sync member Lance Bass, who is listed as the band’s mentor.

In their analysis of this puzzling piece of music, Bilboard notes that the group is managed by Nick Reed who apparently has a history of producing musical parodies. Perhaps that is the smoking gun, but I’d be willing to go either way on this one. Regardless, their official website is a veritable font of hilarity. Be sure to read through the band’s bios which lists the roles for each member, including: Leader, swag general, lead rapper, and youngest. Because that’s apparently a job now.