Empire Roofing: Geekiest Home Improvement Brochure Ever?

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• Eric Limer I need trephination like I need a hole in the head.
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• Max AIM CHAT: I like you, too. *belushis*
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• Eric Limer Listening to Call Me Maybe and cropping screengrabs of Twitter bots. It's times like this that I really love my job.
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• James Plafke Popular rapper Ladies Love Removed Eyes.
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• Eric Limer I am genuinely enjoying using So.cl to make weird picture mash-ups. I just made a collage of becks. http://t.co/ulGbDbwn
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• Eric Limer This Facebook IPO coverage needs to stop cuz I'm seriously sick of seeing Zuckerberg staring creepily at me from the top of every story.
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• Max Put on your poodle skirts and choose your favorite syrup because we're gonna have a sock-hop at the iHop.
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• James Plafke I just threatened my mom to email me something by telling her I'd discuss with her all the lady celebrities I'd have sex with.
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• Max New Hallmark Card: "I held an extended conversation with you without being able to remember your name" Inside: "I'm sorry."
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• Eric Limer To any of you bros who might like to ice me, I encourage you to act on that urge, bro.
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• Eric Limer If anyone is looking for some totally garbled, nigh-incomprehensible ad copy, I'm your man.
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• Eric Limer What? None of my Facebook friends are on So.cl? How can this be?!
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• Eric Limer "Does this mustache look creepy? Experts are blind; can't tell."
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• Rollin Bishop Lin Beifong is suddenly one of the best things about Legend of Korra.
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• James Plafke I just taught someone what TIL means. There's some kind of poetry to that.
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• Max Preparing some mails.
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• James Plafke A porn spambot named "toothsex" just spammed me.
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• Eric Limer Walking my sister through the finer points of PS2 emulation as something of a birthday gift.
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• Max Whoever just had The Strand pull a copy Of the Prose Edda: We should be Viking nerd friends.
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• Eric Limer "That Spacex launch last Saturday was an absolute abortion."
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1. 5 new TV shows every geek should watch this coming fall (Geeksugar)
2. What, exactly, is quicksand? (Mental Floss)
3. Winners and losers of Facebook's botched IPO (The Week)
4. A first look at Michonne on next season of The Walking Dead (TDW: Geeks)
5. So, uh, racing camels are a thing (Environmental Graffiti)
6. 5 Internet annoyances that are way older than the Internet (Cracked)
7. Here's the full video of the SpaceX launch (Hexydes)

• There is a Beer That Tastes Like Bacon and Maple Syrup
• Philosoraptor’s 50 Wisest Musings
• The 65 Best Planking Pictures From Around the World
• 11 Fantastic Photos and Videos of Yesterday’s Annular Eclipse
• Here’s How to Play the Fully Functional Moog Synthesizer Google Doodle and Four Track Recorder

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