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Uncategorized Thursday, September 22nd 2011 at 2:14 pm

Guy Attempts to Survive Solely on His Wife’s Breast Milk

When Curtis and Katie’s newborn baby spent time in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, Katie formed a habit of pumping breast milk every two hours for fear it would dry up. Their second child went into the NICU, so Katie began the frequent pumping once again, eventually donating the excess milk once it was no longer needed. Katie got pregnant again after the second child, and once again, the baby had to head to the NICU, so she got to pumping yet again, but this time milk banks would not take the milk the couple attempted to donate for a variety of reasons, one of which being the medicines she was on at the time of pumping.

So, Curtis and Katie had a large freezer (pictured left) of frozen breast milk. The couple eventually had to move, and they found that transporting all of the saved milk would cost more than they were willing to pay. Rather than throw the milk away, Curtis decided he would drink the milk and see how long his body could survive on only the breast milk. Naturally, the couple is blogging the experience, with the third day’s blog post currently sitting atop the blog, entitled “Day 3 and no BMs.”

Even though the third day’s blog post’s title may seem a little silly, Curtis and Katie seem to be taking the experiment seriously, testing the breast milk and tracking Curtis’ weight and caloric intake. The couple measured out that the breast milk contains around 27-32 calories per ounce, so Curtis must intake 66 ounces of the breast milk per day in order to reach the standard 2,000 calories a day.

In a blog post covering day 1 and 2, Curtis claims he is no longer hungry, and instead, hunger manifests as thirst that he quenches with 16 ounces of breast milk, which keeps him satisfied for two to four hours. In the day 3 blog post, however, he begins with saying that he is much hungrier than the previous day, and instead of the 66 ounces outlined, he imbibed 104 ounces of the milk. He also claims that, so far, he isn’t having anymore stomach issues that he generally experiences, such as acid reflux and stomach aches and nausea, though he does claim that in place of the bowel movements he isn’t having, he is experiencing a lot (he stresses that it is a lot) of gas, but “it isn’t too rank.”

So, why don’t you all stop the low-carb diet and switch to the no food, all breast milk diet? Maybe Katie should’ve gotten into contact with that ice cream company.

(Don’t have a cow, man via Gothamist)

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  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.hails Mike Pants

    Maybe this story is interesting and insightful, but I’ll never know now because my screen is coated in vomit.

  • claire

    People think this is gross, but drinking milk from cows who are hooked up to machines and probably wouldn’t even be lactating if it wasn’t for all the growth hormones is normal.

  • http://www.facebook.com/sarah.maple Sarah Maple

    Hmmm… Certainly not an everyday occurrence. But hey, gotta give credit to those who have a question and seek to solve it rationally. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.hails Mike Pants

    “Natural” and “normal” are not the same thing. I grew up in a society where what you described is perfectly normal and drinking human milk when you are an adult is abnormal, so matter how far you take this out of context, no, it’s gross. 

  • claire

    Those machines & the milking of such long durations means that standard cows milk is filled with blood & puss. So drink up, because it’s accepted.

  • Jo

    FYI: Publix and Kroger have their own brand of milk that is not from cows injected with the bovine growth hormone. They also do not feed the cows genetically modified soy or corn feed. Ergo, their ice cream, cottage cheese, cheeses, etc. do not contain them either. Sweetness with no puss, blood, or antibiotics.

  • Paul Johnson

    I was going to go to bed soon. Then I read this, and now I’m horrified in a “can’t sleep, clown will eat me” kind of way.

  • Purrpussful

    Awww, the blog’s been taken down! : (

  • Suki_papillon

    Get over yourselves people. If you really start to think about it, how disgusting would it seem for a grown man to live solely off the milk produced by a cow? Last time I checked, I’m not a bovine. I have always believed that we should use human milk (that most of us were lucky enough to get at birth) in our culinary persuits. I’d much prefer to cook with human milk, than that of a goat, cow or GMO soybean. I think the cheeses, butters and sauces made of human dairy would be fair better tasting, easily digested and tollerant to all. Instead we say, “Ew, gross!” and would prefer to curl up in a pile of hay and manurer to suck from the teat of a stinky beast. Please people. Time is running out to start using your God given mind and stop buying into the commercial concept of what is normal. I commend this couple for realizing that if that liquid gold is good enough for their gifts from God, then they should have no qualms about consuming it, especially in this day of such waste. You never know what some may need to do to survive, so hold your judgement, because honestly, most of your opinions have made me sick to my stomach.

  • http://twitter.com/wonkydonky wonky donky.

    Leave God out of it, and people might listen to your point.

  • http://twitter.com/wonkydonky wonky donky.

    Keep eating those nutbars, nutbar.

  • Beastabuelos

    i was taking you seriously til you said god. and dont capitalize god, its not a pronoun

  • vvrx

    You are right it isn’t a pronoun but it is a proper noun :)

  • hunter

    dumbass

  • hunt3rk1ll

    your really f***** dumb if any body belives this this guy girl person has no clue what they are talking about i mean who ever this is obviously have lived in the city all thier lives i mean think about it would you buy rotten or meat with e coli in it no would the government let sosity do this no but no there are dumbasses like this person who belive thatcows milk is prodused with cow blood and puss seriously im 15 and no more about life than this dumbass knows about the his own… and dont comment on my spelling cause that just shows that no matter what i say one of you have to find something to argue with me for 

  • Sven

    Leave God in it. Speak your mind. At least, if you’re an American, it’s still your right to do so.

  • Sven

    God, if used as a proper noun, is to be “capitalized” as you put it. Where the blazes did you learn English?

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Z4CJFSWSF6NJQ2QO56FEBHKHJM K

    I think adults drinking any milk – *especially* from another species – is gross.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Z4CJFSWSF6NJQ2QO56FEBHKHJM K

    “Don’t comment on my spelling” = I’m too lazy to present my point in a professional manner.  If you have something to say, and feel strongly enough about it to curse, for god’s sake, run spell check.

    …would I buy meat with E. coli in it?  I sure would, because buying meat sans E. coli is nearly impossible.  Would I want it to be strain O157?  No.  But plain old wt E. coli?  Yum yum.

    Would I drink milk from a cow?  No – that’s gross and unnatural.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Z4CJFSWSF6NJQ2QO56FEBHKHJM K

    Was that free stuff 50 liters of human breast milk?

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Z4CJFSWSF6NJQ2QO56FEBHKHJM K

    It’s pretty gross to see humans drinking cow’s milk.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Z4CJFSWSF6NJQ2QO56FEBHKHJM K

    Sven – it’s a proper noun if it’s a name, but not if it’s a descriptive word (like “deity”) and that’s the point.  Some people do not believe there’s not this dude named “God” watching over us and as such the g should not be capitalized.  Those who do believe in the imaginary dude *do* capitalize it, hence, capitalization = belief in fairy tales, and others not taking the capitalizers seriously.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_Z4CJFSWSF6NJQ2QO56FEBHKHJM K

    Jesus, like Americans need to clutter their minds with MORE religion.

  • Guest

    …. how do u get calcium?

  • Zuzu14

    well i wouldnt mind drinking breastmikl  but it has to be directly from breast worm and nice   i wouldnt live on that for long period of time all day long

  • farmer girl

    unnatural how do u figure-if farmers dont milk them what do u think happens they get so filled up it leeks out on its own duh thats pretty natural to me

  • Angel

    So, is drinking human milk natural as well? This is confusing, if drinking milk from some other species is natural, why drinking our own suposedly so gross? by this logic I think is even healthier to drink human breast milk.

  • Gueast

    Your Man card has just been revoked. Also, shave your beard, you are no longer worthy of the privilege.

  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.hails Mike Pants

    Because drinking human milk is gross? I don’t see a lot of manly examples of people drinking breast milk.

  • Wonky Donky Do To You!

    You not believing in God let me know how small minded and ignorant you are with very little depth. 
    Yea, I want to come to you to be edjumacated.

  • Dxmyles

    If you think it is gross ,why do babys need it, but instead you drink from a cow, hey, its for baby cavles, too,….so dont be, dumb about it, it is a taste to whoever likes it, like cavier, fish eggs,….opinions, are a benifit, for some people, so, think positive, tit milk is good.

  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.hails Mike Pants

    Again, “natural” and “normal” are not the same thing.

  • Chris

    You’re really f***** dumb if you believe that this guy/girl has any clue what they are talking about. I mean whoever this is has obviously lived in the city all of their life. I mean think about it, would you buy rotten meat, or meat with e-coli in it? No. Would the government let sosity (society?) do this? No, but  there are dumbasses like this person who believe that cow’s milk is produced with cow blood and puss, seriously. I’m 15 and know more about life than this dumbass knows about his own… and don’t comment on my spelling because that just shows that, no matter what I say, one of you will have to find something to argue about with me. If you knew anything at all, like you claim to, it clearly isn’t common sense. I just decoded a fricken puzzle for everybody.

  • Normal Guy

    Actually its been a proven fact that human milk is much more healthy for humans than milk from a cow which can actually cause health problems and issues such as Bronchitis Emphysema Asthma, Malignant Neoplasm, and so on. The main problem is after a human reaches a certain age and size, a human female is unable to support them. It would take 5 women being strapped and put to pumps just to feed a single grown man where as one cow can feed 20 people. Its not a situation of morality but more so logic. We use cow milk because it can support many people without issue despite the fact that our own species milk is much more healthy for us as human beings and naturally due to the fact that we’ve spent countless years following the pattern of drinking cow milk, humans have mentally imprinted their minds with the idea that drinking human milk is revolting

  • http://www.facebook.com/michael.hails Mike Pants

    (facepalm) I give up. People are more interested in saying “(nerd snort) ACTUALLY it’s weirder to drink from a cow” than actually paying attention to the actual comment.

  • Vlad98000

    hahah Reading all of these comments was entertaining.

  • Chris

    dude, just sell it to perverts on the internet, you’ll make plenty of money and buy whatever kinda food you want.

  • Mish

    Actually, if you are using God in the term “God-given”, it would have to be capitalized because he was implying that God has given the mind to him. He is specifying that it was God, not someone else, who has given the mind.

    Similarly, we would say “Marxist theory”, not “marxist theory”. We could say “Marx-oriented” for “Marxist”. “God-given” is supposed to be a proper adjective because it implies the Christian God.

  • Jizzypuff

    its not natural to drink another species milk not natural at all. there utters would not be filled up because they have their young to drink it. farmers force a cows body to think its pregnant and force them to be pregnant all the time just so we humans can drink their milk. this is all un natural you must be retarded to think that

  • jizzypuff

    well humans shouldnt need to drink milk after we learn how to eat. do you see a grown cow still sucking milk out of its mothers breast??? no we are saddly the only species who is retarded enough to do this

  • Zacgilbert235

    Yes I have, I work on a farm and there have been a lot of cases of cattle doing this. They are gron and feed off their mothers either way. Your logic is invalid.

  • http://profiles.google.com/postal67 Dennis Carr

    The heck with stored milk, straight to the scource for me….Yummy

  • marty slackjaw

    What’s a breast worm? Ha ha, sounds terrifying

  • ManNursing

    Genius. Think of how economical it will be if only one person in the family has to eat real food. I say eliminate the expensive freezer and containers and go straight to the source.