geekosystem

1. Criminals are stealing restaurant grease (Guy Code Blog)
2. Times Square zombie rescues cat (The Mary Sue)
3. The best geeky poetry (GeekSugar)
4. Colbert takes on Scarborough (Mediaite)
5. 13 things Ebert said better than anybody else (BuzzFeed)
6. Top 5 women with the best shot of making it in the NBA (SportsGrid)
7. Conan wishes Fallon good luck (HyperVocal)

(Title pic via Reddit)

Vortices of any kind are cool, especially when they're small and harmless, as opposed to huge and deadly, à la tornadoes. Leave it to scientists, though, to find something ridiculously cool but on such a small scale that you can't even see it. See, for the first time, scholars have fashioned a lasso made of ultrasonic sounds that can ensnare and move around microscopic objects.

If you tell your parents or significant other that you "finally cleared out all the quests in the Gap of Rohan in the Rise of Isengard expansion" in The Lord of the Rings Online or that you "achieved 100% map completion on Tyria" in Guild Wars 2, chances are, they're not going to appreciate your hard-won endeavor. But what if the places you explored and conquered in those digital realms were matted and framed on your wall in the real world, rendered as maps of fine art? That's what City Prints does. If it's framed on a wall, it's legit, right?

We as consumers like to think that we get what we ask for -- like it's the "demand" part of supply and demand -- but sometimes maybe we shouldn't. Apparently, we asked for The Walking Dead versions of both Risk and Monopoly, because that's what USAopoly and Skybound are sending our way.

Ever since Zombieland managed to garner an impressive following back in 2009, there's been talk of an actual television show set in that universe. At one point, Fox was reportedly attached to produce a series, but nothing's really been too definitive. Thankfully, Amazon Studios apparently realized this was a gross oversight, because they've announced that they're definitely producing at least a pilot for a Zombieland television show. It's not all roses and Twinkies, though.

Sometimes you just can't win when it comes to trying to pronounce certain names. That's the unfortunate predicament MMA announcer Michael Schiavello found himself in during a recent Resurrection Fighting Alliance bout. See, RFA 7 saw Danny Mainus take on Zac Chavez. If you're a teenage boy, or just someone that's been around the Internet long enough, you can probably already tell where this is going.

Let's be real -- there's probably someone in your office that you don't look forward to seeing when you get to work in the morning. Around the Geekosystem office, for example, it's me. As I've said before, the rest of my esteemed colleagues should shut up and stop being such a bunch of whiny babies, because things could be a lot worse. They could work with slingshot savant Joerg Sprave, whose latest invention is a pump action pistol that shoots coins. What's more, Sprave MacGyvered this piece of office artillery together using nothing but things you would find in a standard office setting, meaning he wouldn't even have to leave his desk to make your life a nightmare from which there is no waking. I'm pretty good, but even I have to walk downstairs and get street meat for lunch to make the work environment that unpleasant.

I seriously don't know what we'd do without YouTube-hosted pop culture mashups. We need them to help offset all the nefarious uses people have created with the Internet (malware, porn, etc.). So thank the stars we have videos like this one -- "Star Wars vs. Jurassic Park" (on the YouTube channel Slacktory) -- which combines two things that while awesome on their own, are also surprisingly awesome mashed together, sort of like a cinematic version of chocolate and peanut butter.

Armand Larive Middle School in Hermiston, Oregon has cancelled perhaps its most popular--and arguably most important--class: an extracurricular after-school course in zombie survival skills. The after school class, which included reading and writing elements as well as the training to help kids survive a zombie apocalypse, had more than 70 students enrolled in two sessions. And since it was so popular, of course, administration officials and concerned parents had to make sure that it no longer existed, upholding their sacred duty to make middle school the worst.

Americans are fascinated by British culture -- Anglophiles are rampant and often in control of television channels -- but you know what we are also fascinated by? The animate dead. They're kind of like chocolate or Nutella, improving anything with their inclusion, and Quirk Books has shown us that zombies could even make Jane Austen palatable with 2009's release of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Now folks have done one better. Writer Rob Kutner (of Conan) and illustrator Kody Chamberlain (30 Days of Night) have vastly improved the show Downton Abbey by bringing the dead back to life with their "Downton Zombey" video.

Folks, can we have some real talk for a second here? I'm totally down with the whole sexy monsters thing. I get it. Swayze worked it as a ghost. Vampires have had a certain sensual appeal since Stoker, and yeah, I'll even allow the 'sexy zombies' of Warm Bodies. But at some point, we need to draw a line in the sand, or, you know, several. In the interest of doing so, here are seven monsters that we never, ever want to see given the 'sexy monster' treatment by Hollywood. Not that we have a lot of pull in Hollywood, but dammit, it's worth a try.

People throughout history have come up with any number of ways to celebrate things they like. From pieces of art to questionable songs, people enjoy creating stuff that shows just how big of a fan they are. It's not uncommon for folks to somehow showcase their devotion on their body, and tattoos are a popular choice. Another option is shaving the likeness of your favorite character into your hair. That's how far one The Walking Dead fan went, and it involved everyone's favorite motorcycle-riding, crossbow-wielding zombie killer, Daryl Dixon.

Earlier this month Electronics Arts more or less admitted their launch of SimCity 5 was a complete disaster, and as an apology to angry gamers, offered to give them a free game. For some reason they didn't say which game or games that would be, just that a free game was going to be offered. They've finally come through with a list, and as Rollin guessed, it includes Battlefield 3, but that's not the only game spurned SimCity players can get.

Are there any economists or economics students in our midst? We hope so, because man, do we have the opportunity of a lifetime for you. California State University Northridge economics professors Glen Whitman and James P. Dow are accepting abstracts for an upcoming collection of essays on the economics of the undead. If you've ever sat down and put serious thought into how much blood a vampire needs to survive or exactly how the barter economies that would likely spring up during a zombie apocalypse could be made more efficient, then consider your number called.

Anyone who's ever had to animate something knows what a drawn out and tedious process it is, or rather, it used to be. Being shown off at SXSW this year is a system by Motus Digital that animates actors in real time, cutting the process from months of effort down to an instant action. The booth at SXSW let passersby chat with an animated zombie, but the system could have interesting implications for companies with iconic characters they'd like to let people interact with.