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The 15 Greatest Pairs of Henchmen
What's This?
So you're a villain. Oh, I'm sorry, you're just morally unentangled management. Anyway, you know how it goes: not enough hours in the day, amirite? You've got to delegate.
So you get a henchman. But you can't just let him out there all alone. It's a big dark scary world, and he barely even has a name, much less any characterization! He needs a buddy.
Bonus points if the buddy is the physical opposite of the other, skinny where he is fat, or short where he is tall. Extra bonus points if you can use them as stand-ins to personify a much larger fighting force.
Good luck with your first henchmen! If you're lucky, they'll be with you for years, eternally untouched by the danger of their jobs, messing up every single one of your grand schemes with a far more personal touch than any hero could.
The Rat Creatures, also known as the Hairy Men, are the fighting force of the Lord of the Locusts , the big bad of Jeff Smith 's Bone . And just like the whole of Bone , rat creatures waver back... Read on...
#14
Rob and Don
What would The Dark Knight Returns be without Rob and Don ? What do you mean "Who are Rob and Don?" They were even the Batman: The Animated Series version of TDKR ! They're the guys wearing... Read on...
Bebop and Rocksteady , like all good henchmen, display contrasting physical characteristics, in that Rocksteady was originally a short, stocky Caucasian and Bebop was a tall African American--that... Read on...
Despite appearances, Jasper and Horace Badun are brothers; puppy-murdering/puppy-skinning thugs working in the employ of Cruella De Vil . Arguably the most prominent paired henchmen in a Disney... Read on...
We have gone far too long without honoring the Bard himself with a Power Grid entry, and so allow us to inaugurate his appearance with two of the most speculated on henchmen in literary history:... Read on...
The Unintentional Hilarity of Twitter Spam Bots
Back Alley Internet is a recurring column in which we explore some of the weirder corners of the Internet and see what we can drudge up for your amusement and education. This week: We study the legions of Twitter bots that trawl the trending topics and spit out some unintentionally hilarious tweets.
Tweetosystem
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Eric Limer
You have to tew two tutus?! I have to tew two tutus too!
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Max
The Pizza and Pasta Foundation supports the federal SAUCE act. Ask your congressman to put some SAUCE on it!
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Eric Limer
I like how if you make a mistake typing a popular URL, invariably the site you find is all "YOU'RE WINNER!" It's uplifting for a second.
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Max
Spam for work involves a false teeth supplier and someone looking to buy magnetic plates.
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Eric Limer
So that improv show was definitely a good idea. Ben Schwartz, Zach Woods, Justin Long, AND Adam Scott. #EverythingWentBetterThanExpected
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Max
Got a lot crossed off my to-do list tonight, and I'm starting to feel significantly less freaked about about, well, life.
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Eric Limer
I need trephination like I need a hole in the head.
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Max
AIM CHAT: I like you, too. *belushis*
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Eric Limer
Listening to Call Me Maybe and cropping screengrabs of Twitter bots. It's times like this that I really love my job.
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James Plafke
Popular rapper Ladies Love Removed Eyes.
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Eric Limer
I am genuinely enjoying using So.cl to make weird picture mash-ups. I just made a collage of becks. http://t.co/ulGbDbwn
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Eric Limer
This Facebook IPO coverage needs to stop cuz I'm seriously sick of seeing Zuckerberg staring creepily at me from the top of every story.
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Max
Put on your poodle skirts and choose your favorite syrup because we're gonna have a sock-hop at the iHop.
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James Plafke
I just threatened my mom to email me something by telling her I'd discuss with her all the lady celebrities I'd have sex with.
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Max
New Hallmark Card: "I held an extended conversation with you without being able to remember your name" Inside: "I'm sorry."
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Eric Limer
To any of you bros who might like to ice me, I encourage you to act on that urge, bro.
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Eric Limer
If anyone is looking for some totally garbled, nigh-incomprehensible ad copy, I'm your man.
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Eric Limer
What? None of my Facebook friends are on So.cl? How can this be?!
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Eric Limer
"Does this mustache look creepy? Experts are blind; can't tell."
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Rollin Bishop
Lin Beifong is suddenly one of the best things about Legend of Korra.
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