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Most likely some kind of hilarious joke, this ring is not only made of titanium, but hides a dastardly secret: It imprints the word "married" onto your skin. You know, to stop you from cheating in that very small scenario that someone who knows you're a cheater would buy you a ring because of it instead of leave you, and also for when the person you're going to cheat with actually cares that you're married.

If you're trying to make some sort of statement, or really want to be ironic in some way that doesn't quite make sense, or are really into serial killers and also jewelry, you'll be happy to know that -- somehow -- there are at least three different kinds of Jeffrey Dahmer earrings in the wild, some of which you can purchase.

Made by designer Luke Walker, this miniature GLaDOS -- luckily -- sits in one's hair and looks pretty, rather than runs the owner of said hair through a bunch of test chambers while verbally abusing her. The piece is extremely detailed, and isn't just GLaDOS' head or personality core, but most of her body as well, complete with pipes and little wires. It's so fancy, one wonders if it can only be worn at formal occasions. Head on past the jump to see more pictures of the neat accessory, but don't listen to anything it says.

Etsy user Beth Tastic made this gorgeous viewfinder bangle, which is semitransparent and made of hand cast resin. The bangle measures about 2 inches in height and 3 inches across, is waterproof, and fits the loosely defined sizes of "medium" and "large" wrists, though it is noted that a small wrist can still pull it off. The bangle features shots from one of the artist's photo collections, and the bangles will only be available for a limited time, as they take a while to make. Head on over the the Etsy page for purchase info, and venture beyond the break to see another bangle angle.

This adorable planter necklace by jeweler Colleen Jordan has been popping up on the Internet today, probably because people are just desperate to see some hint of something reminding them of burgeoning life, warmth, and sunlight in the midst of a bleak, endless winter. We can dream, can't we? (Should be noted, this adorable little planter does not come with a plant.) (Etsy via The Hairpin)

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Designer Leeora Catalan's nOir Jewelry has just released pictures of their new line of DC comics jewelry based on the women of the comics universe, and it's kind of shockingly awesome. Sadly, that beautiful Wonder Woman cuff does not appear to be available yet, so I can't go to its page to see just how much more-than-I-would-be-able-to-spend it costs. And I don't even like having stuff on my wrists that much. Oh, and there are also some cuff-links, guys.