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Russian Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Books Will Make You Doubt Your Own Sanity

Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.  Trust us.  The above image is one of the more sane, but awesome, images in this repository of dozens of illustrations of what looks like a series of Russian TMNT knock offs.  (Our favorite thing about it is how obvious it is that the person who drew Shredder didn’t draw that triceratops)  The series starts off weird, even for the Turtles, whose chief opponents were an evil samurai and a brain living in the stomach of a robot who hung out in a giant round tank-like fortress underground.  But then you find the crossovers.

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Just… make sure you don’t have anything to do a spit take with.

So, right.  We start off with the ones that are simply weird, or creepy, irrespective of their relation to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

…Does Donatello have a glass of milk?

As far as I could tell, they got turned into ninja rabbits for some reason in this one.

Is that a floppy disk?!

At first I didn’t even notice that there was a stripper in this one, because I was too busy trying to imagine how April O’Neil can be an employed TV reporter when the only thing she wears is a Post-it colored jumpsuit.

Alright.  That was just a taste.  Prepare yourself for crossover madness.

“OH SHIT, now Doctor Who knows that I’m Batman!”

Working on vintage roasters keeps the Predator busy on the weekends.

Wait what.  We’re Back!?!  WE’RE BACK!?!  You have got to be f- We’re Back!?  The beautiful kids movie that dropped off the face of the earth because it accepted Darwinian evolution as a major plot point and had children signing a contract in their own blood to an evil circus ringleader named-

Professor Screweyes oh god.  Also: stay classy with your racism, 1990’s Russia.  Stay classy.

Krang likes to give back to the community by calling bingo at the local senior center.

And as a finale:

What.  What is this I don’t even.

  • Krang’s face.
  • “Lion” is up there for some reason.
  • “Lion” is not crossed out.
  • The words are in English.
  • Krang’s face.

If you’re looking for more visual accompaniment to your Sunday afternoon acid trip, the whole gallery can be found here.

(Russian TMNT via Monster Brains via The Daily What)

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Susana Polo
Susana Polo thought she'd get her Creative Writing degree from Oberlin, work a crap job, and fake it until she made it into comics. Instead she stumbled into a great job: founding and running this very website (she's Editor at Large now, very fancy). She's spoken at events like Geek Girl Con, New York Comic Con, and Comic Book City Con, wants to get a Batwoman tattoo and write a graphic novel, and one of her canine teeth is in backwards.

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